Well...I just woke up and still I have nothing to do. I wasn't even that tired this morning but for some reason I didn't want to get up, I just really didn't have any reason to. For some reason as of this last year or so I can't find any real good reason to do....anything. Nothing really makes me feel happy for very long. The only enjoyment I get out of anything is spending time with friends and loved ones. Thats the only thing I can figure that life is even for. Just spending time with the people you care for, and helping them when their having harder times. I don't like school. I go to school so I can make good enough grades to get into some college. In college I'll get a degree or something. Probly get a job that I don't even like and I'll be doing it my whole life, for what purpose. I just think its all pretty ridiculous. I don't even know what I'm trying to say by all this, but sometimes its better to just say the stuff you've been thinking for so long, even though most people probly won't care really.

I need something to do. As long as I'm out with some friends or doing something I'm alright. But when I have days like today, when I sit around and do nothing, I can get pretty pathetic. I woke up at 12, did nothing, checked my e-mail, ate some corn dogs, played super nintendo for a couple hours, took a shower at 3, and now I'm doing this. This is stupid. Lookis like I'll be entering stuff in this more than i though I would.

I leave with my old church to go to Arkansas for a mission trip on Sunday. It'll be fun. Not quite the same as a 2 week trip to Chicago, but better than sitting here doing nothing. I heard from Cody today that all we are doing is yard work. That kind of disapoints me. I liked working at the Salvation Army, taking food to the people that needed it and stuff. Playing football with those little kids is something I won't ever forget. They were the freaking coolest kids ever.

I have basketball tournement this weekend. Jalesa might get come and stay with us for it. That would be awesome. I think its only been about a week sense I've seen her, but it seems longer, it always does.

I get my license in less than a month. That will be very convient. In Andrews asking for a ride wasn't that big a deal, cause it would take 5-10 minutes top to get somewhere. Here its a big hassel. Plus Zack had to be a jerk and reck his car. So that will be very nice.

Man freakin Christian and John and all them got to go to the Warped Tour without me. That would have been like the best trip of my life. I've never been to any real good concerts. Only a bunch of Christian ones. Not that thats bad, I mean the Dogwood concert was pretty sweet and East West. But a lot of my favorite bands don't ever come around here. And even when they did come fairly close my mom wouldn't let me go. Maybe I can go next year....hopefully

Yeah it's like 2 in the morning and I'm really tired/bored. But for some reason I probly won't go to sleep for a while. Andrew is staying the night and we're play Super Mario Bros. 3. Its a pretty fun game. Andrew really sucks at it. We're in would 3 and hes only beaten 1 level, I had to do the rest. Well i'm leaving bye.

Well okay, i don't really know how this crap works so i'll probly just do some pretty basic stuff. I'm about to have to go back to church in an hour or so. I don't want to at all. Its not that i mind going to church at all I just don't particularly like my new church. There are a few cool people, but I just don't enjoy it very much. The majority is a bunch of old people, not that thats bad there just aren't a lot of kids. I really miss going to Means. Not to mention it didn't take me like 20 minutes to get there from my house like it does now. Actually I'm not sure its the church, I just miss everyone that went there. Heck I just miss everything in Andrews period. I don't exactly know why but I find the small town atmosphere much better than this. Yeah I can go to the movies or mall without a hassel, but I don't really care about that. And thats about the only advantage to living in a bigger town. It just feels like I'm away on vacation and i'm going to get to go back home soon. But this vacation is getting longer and longer. I think about 2 days ago is when it actually hit me that i'm never going back to stay. No more going to Taco Villa for no reason even though we really don't want to. No more walking around the duck pond or the golf course just because we have nothing better to do. No more getting chased by some weird mexican dude because John was cussing at him on Broadway. Its rather depressing. I'm sure the longer I'm here the more i'll learn to have fun just in different things, but i don't think i'll ever stop wondering what i would be doing right now if i was in Andrews. Maybe climbing on a building just for the sake of saying "Hey, I was on top of that building the other night." And i don't even want to get started on this long distance relationship. This just sucks balls. Sometimes i want to just say this is stupid and we should brake it off. But theres no way i could do that. I've only known this girl for like 2 years, been dating her for like 8 months or so, and theres just something about her. I can't just throw it away even is this is really hard. All of my freinds say I am "whipped" but i think they mistake the term for me actually really liking this girl and wanting to be with her. Its not like i don't do stuff with my freinds, i do all the time. But I do spend a whole lot of time with Jalesa whenever i get the chance. If that makes me whipped than i don't really care. Well i guess i'm gonna stop rambling now, this is alot longer than i intended it to be. bye

Hello, this is Ryan, and i'm really bored. No one will probly ever even read this. Plus I most likely wont be consistent in entereing anything. so i'll just do this for my own amusment whenever I get patheticly bored, which happens quite often actually. So maybe I will post more often think.